We have Kai!!!

Yesterday was our "Gotcha Day". I am not going to sugar coat this post as I want it to be realistic for anyone reading that might be considering adopting an older child.

We were to meet our guide in the lobby at 10am to drive to the Photo Mart. Around 945 our room phone rang and it was our guide Lilly who said "we are in the lobby. I picked up the directer and we are here now". Brooks and I booked it down to the lobby and were able to video our fist sighting of Kai. He was shy and was scared to meet us. Finally at last he came up and shook my hand and he gave Brooks a hug and kiss!!!!!! I hope we have it all on video. I will explain later to why we are not sure.

After the initial meeting we went to the Photo Mart and had our pictures taken. All was good. Then off to the Provincial office.  When we entered the office there was another family there that we met at New Day. They are a truly amazing family. The have 4 bio kids, 4 Chinese kids and they are here to adopt 2 additional kids. You read that right! Number 5 and 6 from China :). They are such a nice family. They gave us some advise and told us it will get better and easier.

One thing I forgot to say is on our ride over to the office Brooks was snapping photos of Kai. Kai took the camera from Brooks so he allowed him to take pictures. All was fine if we let him have the camera.  The minute we tried to take it away the crying, screaming, kicking and throwing himself down on the floor started. OK, I guess the honey moon phase was over. Wow, that was quick. The orphanage directer and the caretaker tried to calm him down. You could tell that they were stressed. I could see that Brooks was really stressed as well. All that I could think about was that return policy that we signed. I was afraid Kai was going to break Brooks within a couple of hours and it would be over... We would come home without him.

We finished our appointment and off to the notary office. There again Kai was acting up. Running off and kicking. Yikes!! All the while packing the video camera or the camera around to keep him calm.  We knew we were in for it. We were trying desperately to ask as many questions to figure out what was going on with him. Is this how he is all the time or is it the stress or what? We noticed that the caretaker kept giving him gum and he would be good. He seemed to listen when she spoke to him and he would do what she told him to do. That was a good sign. Brooks and I were looking for our life line to keep our hopes up that this is a good kid.

We ended up leaving the notary which was walking distance to our hotel. Kai kept looking back for the directer and the caretaker. I ended up caring all 18 kg of him back to a Uyghar restaurant near the hotel. Our guide ordered us food and he ate noodles with lots of chili peppers. Apparently he really likes spicy food.

After that we took him back to the hotel and took him swimming. He loves to swim. After about two hours we told him that it was time to go and the naughty little boy emerged again. Brooks and I were exhausted by this time. We were both thinking , what are we doing? I am feeling guilty for dragging Brooks to China, again.... After returning to our room. Kai was bouncing off the walls. With all the gum, coke and snacks he was really acting out. He kept leaving the room and running down the hall way. It was too many times to count. We decided to take him out for a walk at the square across the street. There he wanted a kite. When we told him no, he threw a fit. Then off to see the pigeons. People were feeding the pigeons and we thought he would like to join in. He kept grabbing the pigeons and when Brooks would take it away he would resist and pull a bunch of feathers out...
We ended up back at the hotel and I asked the front desk if anyone spoke Uyghar. We found a worker who translated for us. We told him that he must not run away from us. He must stay in the room. Etc... When the man was telling Kai all this he was really listening and he was better. The rest of the night was similar to our earlier experience but things got slightly better during the evening.

Tuesday we got up and went to the police station. Our guide was able to reinforce to Kai "the Rules". He seemed to understand. Today has gone much better. Only a few tantrums. We are hanging out at the hotel, limiting stimulation and trying to reassure him. Brooks has been a trooper. Just like Zoe, Kai has bonded with Brooks.

Here are a few things about Kai that we were told or from observation.
He loves noodles
He is a messy eater
Very independent
He bathes at night and washes every square inch twice except his feet, which he washes about 8 times.
He was raised by a Muslim family
His primary language is Uyghar, Mandarin is his second language
He loves the TV to be blaring loud
He is rough
He weighs 40 lbs
He is Uygar and not Han Chinese
He can say "good boy" in English
He was called Yakupa by his foster family
We have pictures of him and his foster family :)
He was spoiled

He has started calling us Mama and Baba
He has been living in the orphanage for the last 2 weeks

We are unable to take photos or bring out the video camera as it unleashes the "monster child" within Kai. Hopefully we will be able to take photos at some point so we can document our first days.
Tomorrow we are going to take him to a park with rides if the weather is tolerable. So far, only our fist day in Urumqi has been cold and the rest of the days have been mild.

We are thinking so much of this behavior is due to stress and his inability to communicate. We see some promising improvement today and hope it will get better each day.
We will try to post some pictures after Kai is asleep as it will require the camera to come out of hiding :)